The Dangerous Lie We Tell Ourselves About “Later”
I recently listened to a conversation between Chris Williamson and Stephen Bartlett, and one idea landed like a punch to the chest.
Not because it was new.
But because it was painfully familiar.
They talked about something called the deferred life hypothesis — the idea that real life hasn’t started yet. That what we’re living now is just the warm-up. The grind. The holding pattern.
And if you’re a business owner, this lie probably sounds like your inner voice.
“Once the business is more profitable…”
“Once things settle down…”
“Once this tough year is over…”
“Once the kids are older…”
Then life begins. But here’s the uncomfortable truth. For most people, later never arrives.
You Can Do Anything — But Not Everything
One of the most powerful points in the conversation was this:
You can change anything you want. But you cannot change everything at once.
This is where most business owners go wrong.
January rolls around and suddenly the list looks like this:
Grow revenue
Fix cash flow
Work less
Get fitter
Be more present
Spend more time with family
Take a proper holiday
Finally enjoy the business
It’s the buffet-plate problem. You load everything on, assuming your capacity will magically expand to cope. It won’t. It never does. In business — and in life — to pick something up, you must put something down.
Yet almost nobody plans for subtraction.
We plan to add:
More goals
More habits
More effort
More pressure
Without ever asking:
What needs to stop?
The Real Cost of “Just One More Year”
Here’s where this hits hardest for me as an accountant who’s worked with business owners for over three decades.
I’ve seen people build successful businesses…and quietly sacrifice their health, their relationships, and their joy along the way.
Not intentionally.
Not dramatically.
Just subtly. One “busy year” at a time.
Stephen Bartlett said something that should make every business owner pause:
“Stop whipping yourself into submission thinking happiness sits on the other side of the next set of goals.”
Because if happiness didn’t arrive after the last milestone… Why are you so certain it will arrive after the next one?
This is the trap of deferred living.
You tell yourself:
“I’ll enjoy it when things calm down.”
But business never truly calms down. Problems don’t disappear — they rotate.
Problems are not a bug of life. They are a feature.
So if your happiness is waiting for a problem-free version of life… you’re waiting for something that doesn’t exist.
If Your Life Was a Movie…
One question from the podcast stuck with me:
If your life was a movie, what would the audience be screaming at the screen telling you to do?
Leave the job.
Fix the business.
Stop chasing validation.
Go home earlier.
Put the phone down.
Book the trip.
Have the conversation.
The scary part? You already know the answer. Most people do.
They’re just too busy, too tired, or too afraid to act on it.
The Bucket List Isn’t a Reward — It’s a Compass
This is where I’ll be blunt.
Your bucket list is not something you earn after success. It’s something you use to define what success actually means.
If your business is profitable but your life feels permanently “on hold”, then the business is not working for you — you’re working for it.
The goal is not to stop striving. It’s to stop postponing life.
Ask yourself:
What would have to change this year for me to look back and say, “That was a good chapter”?
What am I currently doing that 85-year-old me would be furious about?
What am I holding hostage until “later”?
Because later is not guaranteed.
But now is available.
Final Thought
You don’t need another year of heroic effort. You need fewer goals, clearer priorities, and the courage to stop delaying what matters.
Your life is not a rehearsal.
This chapter counts.
If this resonates uncomfortably — good. That discomfort is honesty knocking.
And it’s worth answering.